Sometimes Support Can Make A World Of Difference
Have you ever felt totally alone trying to manage a health condition or your mental health?Then, one day you stumble upon a network of support and compassion, and while it may not have cured you, it gave you some inner strength to manage whatever is troubling you? Did this network give you some comfort? Make you feel less alone?
Navigating challenging life stuff can be incredibly hard as it is, but when you feel like no one around you believes you or understands you, or even worse in someway blames you for the circumstances you are in it can be even more alienating.
I have observed this is often the case for people struggling with and living with excess weight. The people who you would think have your back ie your family, your significant other, your circle of friends can in fact be alienating you even more by somehow subscribing to the flawed concept of attributing your struggle as being your own fault.
This narrative is not only flawed but damaging and hurts the person who is already trying (and has often tried for many years) to find a way to manage what we now know is a complex and multi faceted health condition.
You may have encountered endless well meaning comments, and they usually go something like this: They start with "Have you tried…….?" Or, " the lady at my book clubs daughter's best friend lost so much weight doing this program… shall I find out what it was called for you? "
Sometimes they don't even use words but actions, which can be even more damaging, such as when serving a meal they will serve you less than everyone else, or frown at you if you help yourself to seconds, or they serve you a salad (without asking if that's what you want) while everyone else is having a normal meal. Or they hide food from you, which is insulting.
I'm going to be as bold as to call this bullying. The damage these actions over time can cause is just awful and only serves to alienate someone even more and causes more shame and confusion. What might seem like a small or innocuous comment from someone can cause irreparable damage to the person who it was aimed at.
These people will always say its because they care for you, love you, only want what's best for you and I'm sure that's true on many levels. What I think is broken here is that they do not know about how to best support their loved one. They do not have the knowledge, skills or understanding about complex weight management.
The holiday and festive period can bring many of these issues to the surface. This is why I think we need to give the individual a break from seemingly well meaning, but damaging advice and start to educate loved ones, families, and society to use a different paradigm, and narrative about weight management and give them some new tools to be able to step in and provide genuine, meaningful and loving support.
Ginette © 2018
News and Updates 2018/2019
As promised my little film called "Meet The Therapist" is finally ready for viewing and what a pleasure it has been to work with Meredith Hopes, who not only came up with idea and helped with the script, she also filmed, directed and edited it, and our very dear friend, Susie who helped out with every bit of the practical side of filming and also stepped in as an actor. Finding a therapist can be a daunting experience so we hope our little film will help people feel more confident when making that first call. To view our film please goes to:
It's been a very rich and rewarding year with lots of collaborations and I have a brand new one due to commence in early 2019, which I will let you know about when it is up and running.
In case you missed my last blog the people I've been working with this year offer brilliant services so I will pop them here again just incase anyone you know needs help with relationships or pregnancy.
I was invited as a Guest Expert to talk about some of the emotional aspects of pregnancy and the postnatal period. This program is wonderful. There are workouts to suit everyone, factsheets on everything pregnancy related, from how to safely exercise your tummy muscles to managing back pain, and information videos with a nutritionist, women's health physio, stylist, other mums – and of course me! It really is the perfect gift for a mum to be. So, if you or someone you know is expecting, check out the link below.
"Relationships and sex are such an intrinsic part of our lives and yet can often be complex and challenging" A dear colleague of mine who specialises in these areas has just moved her practice to a stunning new location in the CBD and I had the privilege of witnessing the unveiling of this wonderful counselling space which is the: Sydney CBD Counselling Centre. To find out more information about this practice you may like to explore her website here: https://susietuckwell.com.au/
The binge eating groups are also ready to start in a brand new home so please be in touch if you are interested in joining this ten week group.
Wishing you all a wonderful holiday period and should you need it I will be working through out the holiday period except for the public holidays and am also available for Skype or Face time calls.
Wishing you all my very best wishes until next year.